


I Won't Let Go

by cxstielsgrace



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Goodbyes, Holding Hands, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Parting Words, Season Fifteen Finale, Things left unsaid, don't hate me, first fic, this is sad i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:34:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25160101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cxstielsgrace/pseuds/cxstielsgrace
Summary: Dean held his angel, his dying angel, draped over his lap. His arms, once strong and now weak from an endless battle were wrapped around Castiel. He can’t leave me if I don’t let him, right?
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	I Won't Let Go

Dean held his angel, his dying angel, draped over his lap. His arms, once strong and now weak from an endless battle were wrapped around Castiel. He can’t leave me if I don’t let him, right? 

Dean looked down into what once were bright blue eyes now fogged over and caught them with his. “Cas, you can’t leave me man, not after everything.” A sad smile played across the seraph’s face “Dean”, then a look of alarm as he attempted to sit up, “You have to get away from me, my wings.” 

Dean furrowed his brow and tightened his grip on Cas, “Your wings?” Cas caught Dean’s eyes once more as he said “When I, when I,, when my grace burns out. My wings, they’ll burn too. It will hurt you, being this close.” 

Dean stared at the man still laying boneless in his embrace. He couldn’t bring himself to look anywhere but at his face. The blood, too much blood, stained everywhere else made him nauseous. He set his jaw, “I’m not leaving you. I don’t care, Cas. You won’t be alone, I won’t let you.” 

Castiel tried again to squirm away from his righteous man, the tears staining his cheeks were evident to Dean now. “Stop, just stop moving. you’re in a lot of pain please just stay still, it’s okay it’ll be okay.” Dean whispered into the angel’s hair. 

“Dean”, the man beneath him said once again, this time barely audible. “Don’t let me hurt you, please.” Dean ignored him and grabbed one of the angel’s bruised and bloodied hands, lacing their fingers. 

Dean choked out a sob, eyes glued to their joined hands. This wasn’t supposed to happen. It should be him down there, not Cas. They had fought so hard, side by side along Sam and Jack. He let himself think for a moment that this was all just a bad dream and he would wake up any second. He would wake up and the first thing he would do was tell Cas. Tell the angel who had stuck by him time after time, battle after battle, and through it all still had faith in him, a human. 

“Cas”, the word choked out accompanied by tears of his own. “Cas, Castiel. I- I can’t, man. I can’t do this.” another sad smile from the angel, “I know Dean. it’s okay, you will be okay. You look after Jack for me, alright?” 

Dean shook his head and tightened his grip on his friend. “That’s not what I mean. God, I’m so stupid. I can’t believe this is what it took. Cas, I’m so sorry. Cas I-“ he got cut off by a soft yet pained chuckle from the man beneath him. “I love you too, Dean Winchester.” 

Dean’s vision went blurry, clouded by tears. This was all wrong. not like this, no. It wasn’t fair. He opened his mouth to continue when he felt Castiel squeeze their conjoined hands. Not even a second later he was roughly pushed away. “Cas!” 

There was a bright light, Dean should have looked away. 

When the dust settled, there he was. Castiel. His Castiel, his angel of the lord. The one who gripped him tight and raised him from perdition. The one who ripped him apart and put him back together so many times. 

There was his angel. Wings burnt into the asphalt beneath them, an almost serene look on his face. For a second Dean told himself he was sleeping, he looked so at peace. angels slept, right? 

He felt his world crumble. Vision blurry and unfocused he crawled over to the corpse of his best friend. Dean reached for his hand, now cold and lifeless and he fit it with his. 

He hadn’t even gotten to say it.


End file.
